Scheme 3785 in teaching Billy personal responsibility...

Wait, I don't think he's been alive that many days :) Oh well, it seems like it!

I've had enough of the pig sty that passes as his bedroom.

I've had enough of buying him stuff every time we go out (usually craft stuff that then gets shoved into a cupboard - or onto the floor) - because I'm weak and can't say no.

Because he has so much stuff, he doesn't take care of any of it. While we were away he lost a (cheapish) hand-held video game that my mum gave him - we remember last seeing it when he took it into a cafe for lunch, so presumably the next customer got a good treat! He begged us for another one but we told him he has to buy it himself.

I've tried confiscating - but he has so much that it doesn't seem to affect him; with-holding treats - but he doesn't seem to care etc etc etc but I don't follow through with them so of course they fail.

I always had the belief that he should do things like keep his room tidy just because he's part of the family, without expecting a reward - well, that obviously doesn't work..

So... pocket money begins... with a star chart above his bed to mark off each day. At this stage the only thing I have on there is to keep his room tidy. Once he masters that (ha ha) I'll try adding other things one at a time.

Putting it above his bed will force me to see it every night, so hopefully I'll keep enforcing it.

He'll have his own money so I won't keep feeling obliged to buy him stuff.

$2/week pocket money is probably less than I spend on stuff for him anyway!

Maybe if he buys stuff himself he'll start to learn to take care of it - especially if he's had to save up for it.

It all sounds good in theory - right??! Please tell me it will work!

Dealing with cheekiness - advice please!

Any advice on what to do to combat cheekiness and name-calling? I've never had to deal with it like this before - I think a certain problem child at preschool is setting an example that Billy is emulating because it's only started since this boy arrived...

He's name calling, being cheeky, and out and out rude to me & Pete at times. We've tried ignoring, punishing with loss of tv priveleges, no treats etc, smacking (yes, call DOCS, we smack our child at times...) - nothing seems to be getting through, he just smirks which makes us even madder. It's even worse atm because I let him have a couple of flavoured ice-creams the other day and he's flying high from the colours :(

Like tonight - he was being silly at bedtime and not asking for his water properly (just pointing and saying Drink, drink). I refused to pass it to him until he asked properly - he finally did, I passed the drink, and he muttered something of which I caught the words "You're a P", I suspect the bit I missed was "poo-poo head" which seems to be a favourite :( The rest of his bedtime routine was immediately terminated and I left with him in tears. Tomorrow it will be as if he was never punished for it though..

Is it a 5 year old phase??! Any ideas from the seasoned mums?