I wanted to say thank you to everyone who left a comment about our cat, it was very comforting.
We put her to sleep yesterday morning. I'm just about cried out by now but still get caught off-guard at times. I keep expecting to see her walking down the hallway, or curled up on our bed - every time I see an open door I think "oh I'd better close that so Muffin doesn't get out".
She had a pretty good life - we got her as a kitten 11 years ago, and she was our baby. Admittedly she got her nose pushed out of joint a bit 5 years ago when the real baby came along but she didn't have to share us for 6 years!
I'll post some photos of her once I can get to wherever the CDs have been put while we're moving stuff around.
She'd lost a lot of weight steadily over the last couple of years - she must've had it for at least that long in hindsight. It was never picked up in normal blood tests and it was only when the vet did a specific blood test for Feline Leukemia on Friday that it was found. It's actually a virus, not a leukemia and statistically speaking, she shouldn't have had it. It's mostly found in young cats up to 6 years old, outdoor cats & cats in multi-cat household. She was much older, never stepped foot outside and we've never had another cat in the house. The only time she could have caught it is at the vets or possibly when she was boarded a couple of times. I'm starting to wonder though if she had it right from a kitten - she was quite sick when we first got her and we thought we'd lose her - possibly she's had it that long and it's only flared up in the last couple of years. Who knows, and it's pointless even wondering..
The vet couldn't tell us how long she'd have left obviously, but did say she'd be in and out of hospital with secondary infections for however long she lasted. It didn't take much to make the decision to spare her that.
It's hard though..