Sunday, September 12, 2010

Hold on tight to your loved ones..

Just eleven short weeks ago, my mother-in-law went to the dr with stroke like symptoms - she was having trouble with words and memory loss. They sent her for tests and she was given a diagnosis of a brain tumour.  A week later, after an operation, it was determined to be an aggressive brain tumour - we were told the average life expectancy for that type is 12 months.

4 weeks ago she started on a round of 6 weeks of chemo & ray treatment.  Two weeks ago, on the Monday, she ended up back in hospital unconscious.  The drs didn't think she'd make it through the night.  They pumped her full of steroids to reduce the swelling on the brain, and over the next four days, she gained full awareness and some speech.  Physically she was paralysed down one side, had to be fed on pureed food and had a catheter. The drs wanted to do another MRI to confirm their suspicion that the cancer had grown even with the chemo / ray.  She took each of her children aside and begged them to support her decision, then refused the MRI and any further treatment.  They stopped the steroids on Friday last week.

She passed away this morning about 1:15am, 8 days later.

I'm very grateful that we had the time with her that we did. 

I'm grateful that we made the best use of that time, and spent a lot of time with her.

I'm grateful that the last time we saw her out of hospital was to share a cake for Billy's b'day. 

I'm particularly grateful that I got a lovely photo of her & Billy together on that day.

I'm grateful that we had time to say goodbye and our last words to each other were 'I love you'.

Hold on tight to your loved ones. 

You will be missed so much, Val - you were a great Mum, Mother in law and Ma.

19 comments:

Renelle said...

Thinking of you

libby said...

Hi Kerrie,

Sorry to hear about your loss. Sounds like you have some wonderful memories to help you through this very sad time.
Hugs to you all.

Libby

Tracy's corner said...

so sorry for your loss

Sravani said...

I am so sorry for your loss, Kez.
hugs
Subadra

emma.jean said...

Deepest sympathies to you and your family.

Love,

Emma.

Out Back said...

Sorry to hear this news Kez.

I am glad that you got to spend some special times with your mother in law before she passed away.

Thinking of you all at this sad time,

xTania

Kylie said...

Very sorry for your loss Kez.

Wendy said...

Hugs and prayers, Kez. Cancer is dreadful but it at least does give the family an opportunity to say goodbye and acclimatise to the idea. The oncologist told my sister that when my dad was having treatment and we did see the blessings in being able to say goodbye to my dad.

Be kind to yourselves in the coming months as you grieve for her.

M.J. said...

I am so sorry Kez. My thoughts are with you and your entire family.

mum+dad=akira and linkin and elijah said...

Hugs
We are on an almost identical journey with my aunt.Completely unexpected and shocking :(

The recent losses in my life have taught me the same gratitude you wrote about. I will be forever grateful for those moments I can hold precious in my heart.

Lots of love and peace to you all xxx

Anonymous said...

Hi Kerrie

So sorry for your loss, your blog was wonderful. Thinking of you all.

Karen xxx

Louise said...

Thinking of you kez and your loved ones, and wishing you peace.

jugglingpaynes said...

I'm so sorry Kez. My heart goes out to you and your family for your loss. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

Peace,
Cristian

karisma said...

So sorry for your loss . It is wonderful that you were all able to respect her wishes and have some quality time together. Much Love, Hugs and smoochies xoxoxox

Butterfly said...

My heart is with you, Kerrie.

With love and a big hug,
Vanessa

Korina said...

Oh that made me cry. I'm so sorry for your loss Kerrie and wish I could say anything to make it hurt a little less, instead just know I'm thinking of you.
xxxx

Lisa Walton said...

My sincere condolences to you and your family. The love you showed for her by abiding by her wishes to stop treatment was overwhelming. May your fond memories give you all strength.

Lisa

Danielle said...

I pray for peace and comfort for you all. I lost my grandpa to cancer only a month after he was diagnosed. No matter the timeline, it's never easy.

Joi said...

I am very sorry for your loss.